Good friends & Good books

I'll start by saying that there are two things I really enjoy. Spending time with friends, and reading. Spending time with friends is something I've been able to do quite a lot of in the last few years. Reading? Not so much.

I have been challenged over the past several years by my "friends" quite frequently. I have had several what I thought were "close friends" just drop off the map or stop talking to me altogether because of something that was going on in my life. I now realize that it was because they weren't "close friends." In just the past few weeks, I have had several people from the church reach out to me, take time to read my blog, or just stop to chat at an unexpected meeting. I barely know these people, but it is easy to see that they truly care about me, my husband, my family, my faith.... These are the kinds of people that I/we should be surrounding ourselves with. The same kind of friend that I have tried to be to others...the kind that would lend you their last $5.

We haven't gotten a chance to get involved in a small group at church yet, but I can say that I am very much looking forward to it. I am anxious to find some other couples with young children with a passion for Christ that we can become friends with and build lasting memories with. I can say right now that I do have one true friend. One that supports me no matter what, and that has been such a blessing in my life. He has helped me through some very tough times, and I am eager to find some more true friends to share in my new "changing" life. Through church, and maybe even through this blog that he inspired, I'll find some.

Maybe these new "friends" can suggest some books on God, faith and religion to me, as well. I've been aching to read lately...I've been reading some in the Bible here and there, but am really wanting to learn more. I think it's from our sessions in CORE at VCC, where we are learning about the fundamentals... Eric, our teacher knows so much, and I have such a thirst right now for some knowledge.

For this reason we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding; that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God. Col 1:9-10


I found myself wandering around Mardel on Tuesday in the book section. Holy cow. There are so many books... I found myself thinking "that looks interesting," picking it up, reading the back cover and putting it back, because I was scared that I would read something that isn't right or good. I was terrified that I would read a book that wasn't the right interpretation, or the right belief. I left, empty-handed. So my question is this. You have your beliefs but limited knowledge. How do you keep from "learning" the wrong thing? If I taught my daughter all her life that 2+2=5, she'd believe me because she never knew any different. While I am so thirsty for knowledge, I feel even more suceptible to believing what I hear or read.

I guess, for now, I'll stick to just reading the Bible. I know I can't go wrong with that one.

Two Steps Forward, One Step Back

Last Sunday in church, Pastor Kevin talked about Satan, and how he is constantly throwing road blocks at you. Just when things are looking up, things seem to be getting in order, and you begin to feel encouraged, he strikes...

Last night, Addyson had one of her "fits," and Bob and I had a nice, big arguement. Big enough that we went to sleep mad, and woke up unrefreshed. What a crappy ending to what was looking to be a great day. The day I started my blog. The day I ran into Pastor John and had a nice, unexpected conversation. The day I felt like I was really getting closer to where I wanted to be.

Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the Devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world. But may the God of all grace, who called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen and settle you. I Peter 5:8-10

Like the first step to for a recovering addict is knowing they have a problem, at least I am aware that it is Satan trying to stand in my way. A few months ago, I would have gotten frustrated, discouraged, and held onto my anger. Today, while saddened, I seek to find answers and solutions through prayer instead of trying to solve the problems myself.

To top it all off, I'm not feeling well today. Sore throat, fuzzy head...springtime yucks. But instead of being irritated and cranky that I am sick, I am thanking God for making me rest today. Lying here has given me some alone time to ponder, pray, and hope for a better day tomorrow.

Where to start...

Though I have been a Christian for many years, I have not exactly been walking the path that I should have for quite some time. I have been very stressed and frustrated over the past few years, and realized there was something missing in my life. In November of 2009, my husband and I started attending church at Valley Creek in Flower Mound, TX, and I can now say I have absolutely found what was missing.

Over the past few months, Bob (my husband) and I have gotten more involved in pursuing our relationship with God. We have started attending classes at church, and by the grace of God, Bob was saved last week. I can't begin to express how amazing it is to know that we will be together for all of eternity! Bob's journey over the past few months has reminded me of just how real God is, and how powerful he can be when he is working in your life. That force is what I've been missing.

Over the past few weeks we have heard sermons on worry...something I do a lot of. About money, the kids, the job, you name it. While it is VERY difficult for me (I'm a worrier), I am realizing that worrying about it only causes me more stress, and that the only way I am going to get true resolve of these situations is to turn them over to God. I am not my provider. He is.

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Matthew 6:33

And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19

I am finding every day that I feel better when I wake up in the morning. I have a new love for life, and have a great hunger for more knowledge of Him. I feel at peace when I'm at Valley Creek...it is truly a happy time, a time when I have absolutely no worries, and I like that.

I have always heard that Christians experience "convictions," things that the Holy Spirit speaks to them and instructs them to do. Earlier this week, I was convicted to delete all of the inappropriate music from my iTunes. I dismissed the thought, but found it return to my head day after day. Yesterday, I deleted all of that music...and it felt good.

I have questioned recently whether or not I was ever REALLY saved. I was young, didn't REALLY understand, and certainly haven't walked the path of a Christian since that day. So...just to make sure...I've prayed that prayer again. I've asked for forgiveness, and it's been granted. In that same line of thought, I'm going to be baptized again. I am starting over.

I still slip...I used his name in vain just yesterday. But He will forgive me once again, because that is what he does, and He is good.

I am turning everything about my life over to God. I seek peace, happiness and security.

I'll let you know how it goes.