Visiting Mom....

My dad joined us for service this morning at VCC! It was so great getting to introduce him to all the wonderful people we keep telling him about! By the awesomeness of His plan, my dad was able to visit on a day where communion was served, and the message was about not giving up. Coincidence? We think not. :)

Dad, Addyson and I went to visit Mom for a couple hours after church, and let me tell you, she looked really bad. Her hands have closed up so much that her nails are digging into her palms. Her feet have turned in, and her entire body is in pain. The doctor visited her this morning, and they decided to put in a permanent catheter, which she will keep, even when she returns home. She was also put on a twice a day 15mg morphine pill for pain. I have mixed emotions about both. While I know that the catheter is best for her and my dad, it means that she will be very tied to the bed, and I know that will wear her down quickly. The morphine will also begin to slow her down. It is a transition drug, and while we've been "expecting" this for a long time, and I say that I have had time to mentally "prepare," I am NOT ready.

To top it all off, we are not sure if my mom is saved...and I can't bear the thought of never seeing her again. At least if I knew she were saved, I know that this wouldn't be goodbye...but rather, see you later. I could rejoice in the fact that I knew she'd be with God and that I, and her granddaughters would be able to see her again one day. Though I think it might irritate her a little, I think I'm going to ask someone to go talk to her. As our pastor said this morning, we need to think less about what people would think of us, and more about what would glorify God, regardless of the persecution you have to endure for it.

I don't think it's going to be long. Today, I realized just how weak my mom is. She can barely even drink from a straw these days. I firmly believe that her mind is the only thing holding her on this Earth at this point, and when she let's go, I think it won't be a long journey to the end.

On a lighter note, Aspynne is doing great. She is still doing great on the medicine, and today started her full dosage. She is the same, wonderful Aspynne she has always been, and I am so grateful for that. God is good, and has truly answered our prayers.